Before you read on; my huge news and update will be on my blog next week I promise! Im just waiting on the final stages of something huge before I tell you all!
Today I realised something. I looked back on things and I realised exactly how far I’ve come, and how lucky I am to have the people in my life that I do.
I made it through two of my lessons today without having a signifficant event (i.e. me having to leave said lesson, spend the whole lesson on the floor or have a seizure). It seem silly. But me getting through two lessons with only having to leave for about 2 minutes before returning is a hell of an achievement for me.
I can’t explain it to you I really can’t.
Yesterday (wednesday), I jad a blackout & Seizure in my Health Lesson.
It was not the best of days for me.
However, It was dealt with so well, and I realised then exactly how lucky I am.
We’re over a month into this academic year and I’ve only been to like 4 lessons. My attendance is a joke.
But yet, My college haven’t given up on me. You would think my teachers, Sally, and my tutor and support team must be fed up of me by now with the amount of hassle I’ve caused, I’ve had to have room changes, timetable changes, and I’ve been ill the whole time, but they’ve never made me feel like a pain in the arse once. They’ve done nothing but support me. I will never ever be able to thank them all enough for that.
My friends at college have also been amazing and so supportive. I will also always be grateful for this. I love you squad 😉
Thank you to my main bitch Els (Arden I’m talking to you fester!) For being there for me always. Love you bitchtits.
To all in iD, a huge thank you, and I’ll be back this week fingers, toes and eyes all crossed!
Now- to My Incredible BestFriends Titch (Dani) and Spoon (Jack) have also been amazing.
I can’t describe how lucky I am to have these two incredible people in my life. Theyve both been through hell and back, yet stuck by me no matter what. My rocks and my little festering glittery
– I couldnt do it without them.
I love you both :*
(And ofcourse, I love minititch too!)
So, on to someone else who I coul dn’t cope without…My Luna. You may know her as Gillian 😉
Where do I begin. My loonyluna, the crazy, most gorgeous geezerbird I’ve ever met, you came into my life fairly recently and lets face it You could’ve easily just walked back out again.
But no- you stayed. And now I can’t imagine not having you! You literally are one of my bestfriends. I trust you- and you know thats beyond true!
Thats the only way I can describe it. Bloody hell you’ve become a best friend. Oh.
We both have our own demons. You have everything happening. Yet always- You’re my Luna. And I’m your Sunshine. And your Raisins are waiting for you. So you need to hurry your arse up.
I miss you beautiful! But I’ll see you very soon (even If I have to bloody skype you!) In a short space of time we’ve made more memories than I have with people I’ve known all my life. I could be really mean here and insert multiple pictures of you. B
ut I won’t, because I know. HOWEVER I will put the one of the flamingo hat because its fab. But I realllly wanted to put a different one (you know which!) on but youd kick my arse 😉 xxx
We need a new selfie – thats our new task when you come see me ok?
And one day I might take a journey to the seaside to come see you (but only when things have settled- I promise)
Keep smiling your beautiful smile for me. You’re one of the greatest people I know. And you’re my hero. Don’t forget it.
Thank you for everything and for being there for me. Heres to future trouble making, and all the hugs, giggles, drinking, film days, raisin eating, selfie taking, ikea trips, seaside visits, and general memory making to come!
I love you Luna xxx
Now, on to My amazing Ulicorn. Woah. Now this is a first. I’m all out of words. You are like a second mum to me. You’re a second mum, a best friend, and someone whos there f
or me and my mum 24/7.
You are by far the strongest person I’ve met. And one of the most inspiring.
Thank you for all that you do for me. For coming to parents evening, for taking me to my many hospital appointments, for holding my hand, for hugging me when I’ve had enough of all the shit, for listening to all my thoughts and feelings, for helping me relocate my joints, for knowing when I’m not well, for understanding me, and for always being there for me. I love you Uli- for always and for ever. Xxx
My mum. I can’t begin to explain what my mum means to me, and the things she does for me.
Its so hard to describe my mum. Shes incredible.
She works full time, comes home and then is not only busy with the house, but she comes home and is my mum, and in many ways, my carer. She helps me with my joints when need be, she often helps me with popping out my pills, and helping me carry things or do simple tasks,she times my episodes, she records them when need be. When I’m having a horrible day, when the pains beyond words and I get frustrated, although I try not to, I sometimes take it out on her and say things I don’t mean. Some days I get angry that she has to help me with the most simple of tasks. I’m not angry with her though. I’m angry with me. With my body.
Yet still she just takes it. Im sorry mum I never mean it. I feel guilty that you have to do the things you do for me.
Thank you for all that you do. I love you so much. My mum holds my hand throughout it all. She never gives up on me. She sees me at my worse. And shes amazing.
Dad, I mean, without wanting to repeat myself the only things I can add is that we dont see eye to eye all time, and we have our moments, but thank you. Thank you for everything. For being there for me, for making me laugh, for when in hospital you do that bloody floating head thing with the curtain, for making sure I really am okay when I say I am.
Even if you are a tit at times you’re still my fartfeatures and I love you to uranus and back (get it 😉 ) xxx
To the people that never gave up on me, (so basically all those above and some other special people like mandymoos and co, Matt, Ceri, Chris, My Sandra and Tony and everyone!
And ofcourse My absolutley amazing sister, bro in law and their kids, my brother and family, The Newmans and Clarkies, the stackhouses, beks and peanut, Sasha Vince and the girls (inc Bonnie obviously), auntie ann and everyone, and everyone else who I cant list because it would make the post a million billion trillion pages long so please forgive me!) but these are just some of the people that were either friends or relatives, that have proved me right. Family is not about blood. Its about love, and whos there for you in the stormy weather. Its about who was there to hold your hand without you even asking. It was about who saw the pain in your eyes even though you had a smile on your lips. Its whos by your side, no matter what happened in the past!
I want to thank you for everything. I love you all.
Ultimatley, I mean lets face it…
I started out as this blondeygingery kid with hypermobility, living in london…
And now I’m this 18year old weird, hat obsessed, chronically Fabulous disabled ‘Inconsiderate Cripple’ who wears odd socks every day and lives in creepycrawley.
I havent changed that much.
I’ve just gained a load of illnesses, and met some amazing people.
Could be worse!
I love you all,