Lets talk: Incontinence.

My entire life I’ve had a problem with peeing myself. I NEVER peed in a bath not even as a toddler. I think that now, I just have a real issue with peeing anywhere bar a toilet- so I HATE when I have to use a bedpan in hospital or a catheter or even a commode Peeing in Priscilla ( my commode) i have back at mums affected me more than I ever really discussed and I have no real way of explaining why.

2015, when my “Episodes”  started to worsen, I started to have incontinence. I peed myself more than once. A long story short my confidence went almost completely, so my mum brought me some tena lady pants. At the time I felt so embarrassed. I didn’t want anyone to know. I wear incontinence pants every day. Its not always Tena ladies even though they are my favourite brand I also use depends and I also like some other brands but this isnt a review or comparison post, though that’s coming soon.

I remember feeling so ashamed of myself. Until eventually after talking to some very special people. I realised that actually, it was nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about.  I did a post about tena ladies and a bit about my journey with peeing myself 2 years ago now, and its my most popular post. since that post I get emails every single day from people like me, who have a form of incontinence, reaching out to get advice on different types or brands of incontinence pads, or sometimes its just needing to talk to someone who gets it.

I’m not ashamed of myself anymore. With all i’ve been through these past few years, I think I lost my dignity too many times that I dont give a Shite ( shite is another thing I’ll be talking about further down the post ).

Incontinence. Its often considered a dirty word. A taboo subject. something for behind closed doors or whispered conversations.

But WHY?

WHY is it something to be ashamed of?

I watched loose women a little while ago and they were talking about stree incontinence. Which isnt what I have, but the GORGEOUS kaye adams (i am like one of her and Nadia Sawalhas biggest fans if you didnt know)  said about people having issues with the word Incontinence, that its a word that people dont like, and that we should call it a wee problem. Which I actually love. Its the ultimate pun. “A wee problem”

But the thing is she is so true. People hate the word incontinence. its whispered. Even people that i love dearly in my life SSSH me if i start talking about incontinence in public. Or they tell me to save it for private conversations behind closed doors. But WHY?

WHY is incontinence a dirty word? WHY is it a topic only for whispered conversation?

YES ok its embarrassing at times if I come back round from an episode and I’ve peed or shat myself.

Because, YES, sometimes inconitence isnt pee. It can be poop too. Or both. And yes i have experienced this too. I’ve had a bad episode and woken up in my own shite and pee. Wearing the inco pants helps more than i  can explain. it not only helps to contain it but it also means if it im in public im normally not as badly covered as i would be without it.

Inco pads are also handy to sit on in cars chairs and to put under the bed sheets.

Im getting annoyed writing this post.

Because its making me think of all the nastyness that ive had about my incontinence from other people. And how many people contact me and tell me about how people have treated them regarding this issue. Its disgusting.

My incontinence ,its out of my control.

Its not my fault. And yet sometimes when I’m talking about it  a few people will roll their eyes or ssh me, they make me feel like it IS my fault. Like i should be ashamed of myself for it happening and even more ashamed of myself for talking about it.


Its more common than people think.
Im not a convicted criminal discussing my crimes.


I genuinely want to know, WHY is incontinence taboo? WHY is it such a bad word?!

So please. Email or Comment if you have an answer

and please continue to email and get in touch if you need to talk about anything with someone who gets it. Especially if its about Peeing yourself. Because mate do I know what its like.

Over and Out  TICers







About The Inconsiderate Cripple

Hi there, I'm the inconsiderate cripple. Welcome to the world through my eyes. Welcome and Hopefully - You'll stay with me on this journey!
This entry was posted in Chronic Illness, ehlers danlos, Health, personal blog, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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